funny conversations

Brandan enjoyed having Uwe over for dinner one day, Uwe played starwar video game with him and became his best friend instantly.  Here is a conversation between the "friends".

B: do you have a boy?

U: what? 

B: do you have a house?

U: yeah!

B: do you have a boy in your house?

U: no, i don't.

B: you got to get one, every man needs a boy!

U: why?!

B: because he can play video game with you, you know?

U: no, i don't have a boy in my house.

B: you can get one, from the store, they are expensive. (with eyes rolling)

U: i heard they are even more expensive after you get them in your house.

B: but you get a boy to play with you.

Another day when i was driving and trying to find something from my purse.

B: you got to put your hand on your wheels.

m: i am,

B: no, both of your hands.

m: ok, i am sorry. I will now.

B: you got to be careful, drive slowly and follow that car in front of you. So you don't crash.

m: that's right. If i drive bad, the policeman will catch me.

B: are you boogieman? Policeman only catches boogieman, you are mommy.

m: yes, policeman catches boogieman, but they also controls traffic.

B: they have guns, they will shoot the boogieman, but they won't shoot you, because you are good, ok? you are a good mommy, but you need to put BOTH of your hands on the wheels.

m: ok, thank.

B: i want to play video games, i never play star war video games before.

m: but you are sick and your eyes hurt.

B: if i don't play, i am still sick and my eyes still hurt.

m: no video games, if you are so sick, you should go lay down.

B: I laid down yesterday, i laid down today and i am still sick. please video game please.

m: no means no.

B: 1 no means no, 2 nos means yes.

m: (rolling my eyes and sigh!)